Last night I had a strange dream. I dreamed I was trying to get up some stairs at one of the shuls (synagogues) that I daven (pray) in. There was a narrow staircase with objects hanging from the sides and from above that had pins sticking out. I got stuck on one of the pins and couldn't move. As I was desperately trying to free myself, I heard kaddish being recited upstairs in the shul. I started to recite the prayer, but doubted that I was actually part of the minyan (quorum) needed to recite it. Here I was, so close to getting inside the shul, but unable to be part of it, the result being I'd miss a kaddish.
Missing a kaddish is a big deal. So far I've only missed two, once because I came home too close to the Sabbath and missed the afternoon Mincha prayer just before Sabbath prayers had began and the other when I was traveling to visit my father. I can't really explain why it's so important to me not to miss a kaddish, but it is, as my dream was apparently trying to tell me.
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